As I'm reading it, I'm sifting and analyzing very keenly the style, trying to see if I think I could do as well.
So far, I've read through chapter three. It's good - and it's quite interesting so far. The premise is a little odd to me, and not one I would chose, but that's just personal opinion.
There's been one space battle. She writes it like I would write, not knowing military things well. It's very star trek like. The people on the bridge are addressed by their first names. There are no seat belts. "Warp" and "quantum torpedoes" are mentioned. There's a "replicator" in the captain's quarters, though it's called a "fobium" instead. There are also "hyposprays" being used in medical. That's not inherently bad. The story still carries well. However, this is something I definitely want to veer away from in my own writing. I know I don't know military things AT ALL, and I really want to do a crap ton of research on the stuff, so that the military scenes I do write feel at least closer to real than star trek.
The story still works fine, and in fantasy, one doesn't necessarily have to worry about that kind of thing. However, I really really want mine to have an atmosphere of reality. I also wouldn't have given a perspective from Lord Kyle so soon, because I would have wanted him to be more mysterious, but again, that's personal preference. I'm looking forward to good things here and I can't wait to read the rest of this book.